Thursday, May 24, 2007

Why Do We Feel the Need to SPEAK?

I was at my small group last night, and we split off into groups of 4 to spend some time praying for one another. One of the girls in my group shared that she recently ended a 5 year relationship with a man. She loved him and wanted to spend the rest of her life with him, yet due to certain circumstances, she decided to end the relationship. She's hurting, she's doubting herself, she's scared, and she's sad (to say the least).
In the midst of her sharing, another person in our group felt the need to continually open her mouth and offer "words of reassurance" to this woman. I couldn't help but internally cringe at some of the trite phrases and statements she was making. WHY DID SHE FEEL THE NEED TO SPEAK AT ALL?
Why do we have such a difficult time being with someone who's hurting and accepting the fact that we have nothing to say that is going to make their hurt go away? It's hard...I've experienced this myself many times. I want to "fix" things, but often life doesn't work that way. Sometimes we're called to just "be" in a space with someone for however long they need us to be there, where words can not only be ineffective, but even more harmful.

Saturday, May 12, 2007

I Don't Want to Drown

I went down for a walk on the lake path yesterday and, as usual, stopped about 1/2 way through my walk to sit in my favorite spot. Sometimes I'll pray, sometimes I'll observe, and sometimes I'll just feel the sun on my face and breathe deeply.
This day was quite a windy day, and as I sat there, I became mesmerized by watching the waves of Lake Michigan rolling and crashing into the rocks. I couldn't help but think: "This is how my spirit has felt lately; like there's these tumultuous waves crashing around inside of me, leaving me feeling quite unsettled." And I've been fighting so hard against it. I don't want to feel uneasy or unsettled, like a storm is brewing. I much prefer feeling that peaceful serenity.
And yet in the midst of my musings, God brought this thought to mind: If a swimmer finds oneself in the middle of a storm, to fight against the waves will only exhaust one faster and lead to more sure death. However, if one allows himself to "feel" the waves (to roll with rather than against them), there is a much better chance of survival.
It's hard to believe that God has placed this "unsettling" in my soul for a reason. I pray that He'll give me grace to roll with the waves rather than continuing to fight against them and drown.

Saturday, May 5, 2007

The Lone Star State

I spent last weekend in Dallas, Texas with an old friend of mine, Tasha. Most of our friendship has been spent with both of us in separate states, and it was fantastic to finally be in the same place for 4 days, having lots of fun, experiencing new things, and simply being together.

We started my vacation off on a good note with pedicures! It was my first one ever. I've never gotten one before due to the extreme ticklish nature of my feet, but I made it through with only a few uncontrollable "jerks" :) Even now, a week later, my toenails still look great! (I think this may become my new luxury...)

Of course, being in Texas, Tasha made SURE that I was able to experience the grandiose nature of a rodeo. I think I was holding my breath every time a cowboy came out of the shoot riding a crazy bull. I was nervous for them! (And you thought SKYDIVING was dangerous...not even close!)

My last night there we went to this revolving restaurant in down-town Dallas that's up really high so you can see the entire city. It was a gorgeous view! We saw the sunset, as well as all the city lights at night, and enjoyed an over-priced meal :)
After I got back home and was thinking about my visit, I couldn't help but smile. Friends like this are hard to come by, and they should be treasured. I was reminded of this, even in a crazy Southern town like Dallas.










Wednesday, May 2, 2007

HOPE

Someone at my small group tonight made the following comment:

"Hope is a future without fear."
I like that.